Today is the day you would have turned 15. I can still remember the circumstances surrounding your birth, that you came earlier than expected and how your life was preserved through miraculous means. We got to keep you more than once when it seemed so likely we’d lose you … until it was your time. Then we had no choice but to let you go. We’re still comforted at the idea of the rest you’ve earned. You are at peace (and most likely at work too) in your heavenly home.
While that idea comforts me, I can still feel the hole of not having you here, especially on days like today when we would be celebrating another year of your life. How is heaven? Are you with all our ancestors up there, including both grandpas, Uncle Rulon and your cousin, Graycee?
At times when I miss you the very most, I try to do things to honor you and your memory, like running a 5K in your honor.
Or creating a shrine for you in my bedroom.
Or living my life as much as possible because I know that’s what you’d want me to do.
Our family here on earth still misses you like crazy. It was quite a period of trial and testing when we lost you, and at times it’s still really hard. But we’ve also been greatly blessed with many miracles along the way, too numerous to list here. And we’ve felt you close on more than one family occasion already with more still to look forward to.
So, beautiful angel, while you do your important work on the other side, we will continue our lives here, honoring you, remembering the great times we had with you and looking forward to the time when we get to see you again. Your life may have been short, but you still touched many people while you were here and continue to inspire others even after you’re gone.
Please know how much we love and will always miss you. Know too, dear Ashley, that we continue to hold onto our hope of the time when our family can be together again.