Tonight, my cousin had her nephews over for a sleepover. They are darling little boys and so well behaved too. It was an enjoyable evening hanging out with these sweet kids . . . and then it was bedtime.
I’d gone upstairs for a few minutes, not able to take another episode of Sonic, the Hedgehog. I came back downstairs to see the boys all ready for bed and so I started teasing them about how going to bed was no fun. The 6-year-old looked at me and said, “I absolutely agree!”
My cousin cautioned me not to encourage them in this desire to do anything but go to bed, and I laughed. I am a bad influence that way.
It’s probably because I think deep down inside, I hate going to bed myself.
Don’t get me wrong — I enjoy sleep as much as the next person and getting enough to feel refreshed for the next day. In fact, sometimes actually going to sleep is my favorite part of the day. It’s just the actual going to bed that’s difficult for me.
I’m just no good at it.
Even knowing that I have to get up early for work (and with the commute time every morning, I really do have to get up or I’ll be late, and I hate that) is not always enough to motivate me to go to bed at a reasonable hour. I’m really talented at finding all kinds of excuses to keep myself up, from looking at blogs, to working on some project to reading. I keep thinking I’m old enough to have grown out of the habit of reading until way too late at night, until I do it again and have no sympathy for myself when I’m tired the next day.
So, I sigh and recommit myself to going to bed at a reasonable hour, even knowing it’s a bit of a futile exercise since I’m just not good at putting myself to bed, even when I’m really tired.
Maybe deep down inside I’m just a little kid protesting at the idea of being put to bed, but I’m just going to have to find a way to get over that or spend my life tired from lack of sleep. Since that’s the case more often than not, I think I’m already halfway there, so it’s all good. I decided a long time ago that if I ever wake up and am not tired, I’ll know that I’m dead. If I’m dead, I won’t be waking up anyway, so I suppose it’s a moot point.
In the meantime, I’ll continue finding ways to motivate myself to go to bed at a reasonable hour. Any suggestions?